Insomnia

I was diagnosed at 16, Insomniac. Now to understand my insomnia it is best to understand also how I deal with it. I can’t simply lay down and go to sleep. Not until “magic hour” where I am finally able to lay down and sleep. I usually have watched movies when I couldn’t sleep at the late hours of the night. 2-3AM and wake up for school or work or what ever. The toll is a lack of energy. To those who say, “there’s a medication for that.” I know I used some but can’t afford to take them. Even then, the sleep aids I do use tend not to work. I have taken 24 Tylenol PMs in a 6 hour period. Not my smartest move, but I still didn’t sleep.

Add in the fact that I have suffered from nightmares for about 2 years, that didn’t help. I did everything I could to help me sleep. I stay up late and every evening around 9 or 10 PM my insomnia starts. I just can’t simply go to sleep. Sleep is important for many reasons, in fact the issue of lack of sleep is addressed in the film “Fight Club” as the main character’s original problem.

It is somewhat hard to know that I won’t be able to sleep. To know another sleepless night awaits. I deal with much as a side effect to this but in everything I know I could be worse. I also know that there are worse insomniacs than myself. To the many out there that understand; I salute ya. To the insomniacs out there – you know the meaning of these words, and how good it is to say. “Goodnight” But in the words of Robert Frost, “…and miles to go before I sleep.”

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